It was 10.30pm. She was unwell the last week so we didn't practice and on the weekend I was busy with Storytelling.
Amidst all this we forgot about the exam. Now the mother in me wanted to react...I wanted to give my daughter a lecture, maybe like this...
"What?? You're telling me now, why didn't you remind me earlier. Why did you go to play? Why didn't you study? How can you forget? You're so careless. You can't even remember your exam dates"
I could have done that and maybe that's the easiest way to express our anxiety or fear or any big emotion we are going through, but I chose to Respond.
I said, "Hmm both mumma and Samu forgot about it. Sometimes we do forget things. Now we can sit for quick 15 minutes and you can ask me any doubts you have."
She quickly brought her IEO workbook and the next 15 minutes we were engrossed in solving the paper.
What surprised me was the way the things went smoothly and today morning she had more doubts. She even solved one more paper today morning.
All this happened because as a parent I chose to Respond. When children are anxious or scared or are facing any big emotion, they don't need an adult who is yelling, lecturing or advising. They need an adult who is able to guide them to a solution and stand with them. That's your responsibility as , 'A Better Parent.'
Today I want you to think which are some of the situations where you as a parent, react and how can you choose to Respond, effectively.